A Tear In The Open

So, a majority of my involvements in life are highly uncertain. I'm not into it. I don't know how I even stay sane and handle shit sometimes, but I'll figure it out, like I always do. It's been a really long time that I've actually felt like I miss someone, and right now, I think I kind of do, but there are few things that I need to make sure are right before I let myself go again, if ever.

Adventureland was kind of just depressing. But in reality I think I just take all love-related movies way too seriously now, and it ends up ruining my cinematic experience. I think that's the start of a FML post.

Why do I always end up having these crazy encounters/conversations about drug and alcohol abuse just because I'm straight edge? I will not avoid certain situations, ignore an intoxicated friend in need, or go out of my way to put down your personal choices ever because of what I think about those things. It amazes me that people find it "interesting" that I have no problem in attending a party, or a bar, or whatever when that's basically all that's around. Guess what, it's part of being human, whether I like it or not. Just because I most likely want to slit my throat when I'm around you all, it doesn't mean I will. Or maybe I should?

Oh Tiesto how I appreciate thee, even though you're music alienates me from all of my actual "cool" friends. Sigh.

If I Could

Just when I thought I could count on myself, I'm enfatuated with yet
another illusion. I'm sorry but I have sincerely lost all interest in
proving myself wrong in terms of the nature of human beings and social
interaction. However I have rightfully gained the ability to embrace
withholding any sincere emotion to anyone other than myself and
friends for a long time and I can only imagine it will stay this way
for quite sometime. I'm late for Spanish.

Nightdrive With You(rself)

It's moving scenery and a chance to reflect. I can't look or move anywhere but forward anyhow.